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Wednesday, June 18, 2008
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK OFF
AND
LEAVE
ME
ALONE.
Posted at 7:10:38 pm by dinoxjo
Through the windows, I watch the television lights flicker on the wall. The hour is late and the house is quiet aside from the fake laughter of an old sitcom rerun. The streets are calm and the few lights barely illuminate the roads. My feet take me, creating an increasing gap between me and that house. On the other side, there is another lost soul wandering as I am. Looking straight ahead only sneaking glances from the corner of our eyes, we avoid each other and do not ask questions. From the forest there are sounds of leaves rustling and the tiny steps of a creature looking for some comfort in the darkness of the night. The moon illuminates the clouds, giving and misty look to the sky. Water begins to fall from the sky, and my hair sticks to the back of my neck. Tha rain falls hard, but no amount of force could wash away the memories and images surrounding me, haunting me. My pace is steady and even the splashes of the sudden passing cars can not shake me. Hollow and lost, wandering the city. The street lamps flicker as the bugs encirlce it. A familiar tune is playing in the air as the birds awake in the early dusk. And as the twilight breaks through, I return to my place. Time starts again and my time alone will remain the fuel for yet another day until it is time again to return to the streets of the city, where I belong.
Posted at 2:42:57 pm by dinoxjo
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Yes my dear friend, your shine did reppear more than once this week, but is it perhaps time to let you rest once again? I told on you today, oh yes I did. There were no tears, no screams, no looks... only pained deep breathing and slight shaking. A quivering voice told me to believe, told me they still believed, told me they loved me. Did that voice put you to shame yet? Did that voice show you your place? Or will you continue to haunt me with your whispers? Eating me from the inside out, until the neatly scarred steps you leave behind cover my leg. I know you've become like family, and I realize you are the only one who ever helped. But you're killing me, slowly... slowly... slowly. And one day, when I leave you, what will you do? When they find you, what will they say? Perhaps it is time to say goodbye. Perhaps it is time to give you away. Perhaps. Your presence surrounds me, controls me, holds me.. and I think it's time to let go. I have to let go. So this is the end, my dear friend. No more shall the yellow light reflect off or your smooth and sharp surface as our bodies collide in the deepest florid mix of tears and sweat. Farewell my dear, maybe in another life...
Posted at 10:51:56 pm by dinoxjo
Now, I know I pretty much keep writting this same shpeel pretty much every two or three weeks, but truly... I'm just so confused. Some days, I can see them there, staring me right in the face. And I just want to grab them and never let go. And other days, it's like they all go hide away in their rooms and wait for me to leave, and all of a sudden I'm not sure who it is I need, want or have even. Sometimes I think it would just be simpler if I had no one at all, seeing as most of the time that's how I feel. (aside from the two or three i actually have opened up to and shared with, them i know they're forever). But then there's those who I always seem to choke around, those I never seem to open up to.. simply because I feel they will judge, and that is one thing I have pretty much always feared...
I know I'm repeatative, but I'm still trying to find the answers.. I thought I'd actually found who I want and needed around, but now it seems it was on a one week thing... so I guess I'll just start over again and continue to cut my ties until I am finally down to the few who deserve my tears but never make me cry.
First person to go?
Posted at 10:40:37 pm by dinoxjo
A busy day, I must say. It started with an early wake up call. I can't quite remember my dream, although it's lingering on the tip of my tongue. Then some training at a workplace, quite enjoyable. My stomach churned and I burnt my finger pretty bad, but everyone was kind and the whole experience mad me smile. Then, a surprise although expected. A good talk followed by some playfulness. There was no anger or hate, only some shock and disappointement... But that, I can deal with. Some positive words, a few steps forward. Some breakage of the rules. Then a soccer game, ah... what a sad sad game. Les Bleus on tomber encore une fois face au *spits in disgust* italiens (notice the NOT capiltal "i"). And then my very own intense game of foot. We lost, but it wasn't my team. Playing with the U-18's, a whole 90 minutes (well 85, because i get PUNCHED IN THE FRIGN HEAD).. how intense. A fresh burst of adrenaline and drive to prove myself capable... successfully accomplished by the words of the others and the coach my team and theirs both share. And plus, I caught site of some good old friends from back in the day... back before my life kind of began to fall and my anchor left me. But that's all in the past, and it was nice to see some rather friendly faces. And now, a nice relaxing evening. Here, reminiscing about todays events and successes, and preparing for a lock down day of intense and non stop studiage tomorrow for a lovely science 430 exam... ahm ah so excite.... .... .... NOT!
ahhh.. borat...
Posted at 10:33:10 pm by dinoxjo
To Write Love On Her Arms
Jamie Tworkowski, my hero.
please support twloha at
www.twloha.com
or
myspace.com/towriteloveonherarms
read the story,
read his thoughts,
watch the videos,
and spread the word.
love is the movement.
Posted at 3:21:38 pm by dinoxjo
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photography site!
NEW JULY UPDATE!
“The past, I think, has helped me appreciate the present - and I don't want to spoil any of it by fretting about the future.”
- Audrey Hepburn
“We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”
- Albert Einstein
“Just because you get distracted by the silver lining, doesn't mean there's not still a huge dark cloud behind it.”
- Drums, Girls and Dangerous Pie
Dino Jo is currently feeling
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